that's creepy yo

Take a seat, right over there.

+22

What are you doing here?

Nothing, we were just gonna hang out and read a book. I swear.

+17

It wouldn't be illegal because in the movie she's his daughter. It's only pedophilia if it's someone else's kid... at least that's how I justify it. Take that Kriss Hanson.

-9 [show comment][hide comment]

^ Umm, look pedophilia up, it's having sexual desire with children, regardless if they're your on. And in fact, I think it's worse to have sex with your own kids. Your supposed to be the ones protected them, not f***ing them.

+5

yeah wow...i hope you don't have children

+3

Oh did you miss the part where I wasn't serious?

+5

Fun fact: The bible condemns almost all forms of incest, but not having sex with your daughter.

+4

I never took them seriously when they said child molesters where EVERYWHERE on the internet. Professorbooty has made me a believer. Please for the love of god don't ever have kids, and don't ever try to sound witty.

The Kama Sutra is a very long book made in the Gupta period of India. The Gupta period, named after Chandra Gupta Moriya, (?) is considered the Golden Age of India by many historians. Contrary to popular belief, the Kama Sutra is actually a book on how to be a good emperor. It has instructions, accompanied by a multitude of very vivid pictures, on how to do many kingly things, such as rule an army and control people well. It also has instructions on how to have sex to make a very good prince. OMGANCENTPRON!

F*CK DAKOTA FANNING. That role was originally supposed too go to me, yo. First of all, she came to the audition an hour late after I was had already given my monologue and was closing the deal with Mr. Speilberg. Being the nice guy that I am, I told Mr. speilberg to give her just one chance, and that was the last I heard from them. Dakota Fanning is a f*ckin bitch.

-7 [show comment][hide comment]

Why would you ever want Tom Cruise as your father, fake or otherwise?

I couldn't remember what this song is from, and then oh god it all came back. They played this song while The Punisher did a victory lap around all the punk foo's at the Stephen King Supermarket.

+2

he stole the idea from me http://tomdiscoversjeezuz.ytmnd.com/

-4

tom cruise is known for alot of things, but never soliciting sex online with a child

-5

you never know with tom cruise

+3

not with a girl anyway.....

+8

He wasn't doing it online, he was doing in irl

+5

Until now! Rob Schneider is...The pedophile!

+3

why don't you have a seat over here please.

+4

congratulations on getting to the your the man now dog hall of fame

-17 [show comment][hide comment]

YOUR STUPID

+6

is superior to my stupid

+17

That terminator should have raped Tom Cruise.

+2

^I couldn't agree more.

+1

Dakota Fanning is Cruise control for Tom

+5

You're on national television with Dateline NBC...

ownd

Hi, I'm Chris Hanson

+2

Have a seat. Would you like to explain what you are doing here?

+2

We were just gonna hang out, man, you know? Watch some, uh, movies and sh*t. I wasn't gonna try nuthin'....

+1

....I always have condoms on me, sir >_>

+2

there's a part in the film where dakota is looking out of the back of a car as it pulls away and one of the scenes where tom is running could be combined as if he's chasing after her after she's been rescued, otherwise she never really gets "saved" because it's a loop and the nightmare continues

+6

"...and the nightmare continues." Right on, haha.

+3

lol ur on a roll my man

I was waiting for a slit throat. But that would be too violent for YTMND.

+2

I was going to give this a 3 but it just doesn't work with this site. It's Tom Cruise. This idea would have been alright in a context where the idea was cohesive, but with a guy trapped in the closet it just doesn't work. I don't even know if Operating Thetans are allowed to have sex.

I don't know you expect complete accuracy or coherence. This is ytmnd.

-2

I guess you could say we're on CRUISE CONTROL. I JUST. MADE THAT. UP!! Ha-Ha-ha!

+2

I'm Chris Hanson.

+2

ha ha i get it! $_$

Better than the original.

+1

Why don't you take a seat in the top 15... grats!

+3

Chris Hansen just looks like such an angel. He truly is going to save her. I just know it.

+2

Oh god that's just creepy as hell. Waiting for a Scientology version of this.

-4

Never mind I'm retarded.

+12

Come on in! There are some chocolate chip cookies on the table.

+1

I'll be right back, I just gotta put these clothes in the washer!

Better than the original. And the original is pretty good...

+1

Holy sh*t.

Lucky!

lmfao chris hansen in the background LMFAO.. Uhh, can I ask you what you're doing here? How long have you known this girl?

Chris Hansen is my hero!

better the pedos should get her than the scientologists. HI, I'M BECK HANSEN

It could have used a little Chris Hanson rhetoric, but otherwise Boom Shakalaka!

I lol'd

YOU WIN!

Please add in "Why don't you have seat over there?"

hmm, butt sex ?

"SEX with little girls" is what he's caught doing. "The armed Scientologists forced him to do it" will be his lawyer's legitimate excuse.

5'd for dead can dance and statutory rape.

she was a lot more than statutory

lol chris hanson ftw!

this is probably the worst site on the front page

oh snap Chris Hanson'd!

I'm Chris Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaanssssssssssssseeeeeeeeeeeennnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn

Has he come to save her, or join in?

nice music choice

LOL PEDOPHILIA JOKES

-5

LOL PEDOPHILIA JOKES

+5

You are a sick, sick person.

One of the best sites ever made

Why don't you have a seat right over there, Tom Cruise?! >:O

4 stars alone for including Dead Can Dance ^^

both of them are creepy and ppl i could care lless of -1 u 1'd a moon man -43218577258347593845672984572358923759823475984375982457249857342985743295872349587243958347n*gg*r895247957843589349853487959873455

awesome

wow - that song from the mist awesome site

Can I rape you anally... I'm going to stick my ____ ____ up your _____.

Take a seat , preferably over there ->FBI

Tom cruise didnt see the ep where I tried the same thing

rofl